Friday, December 31, 2010

My Round of Words in 80 Days Goal

I have decided to make my goal 500 words per weekday. Yeah, that's small, but with my DH in the hospital, I'm keeping it simple.

Lena Austin
http://www.lenaaustin.com/
http://depravedduchess.blogspot.com/

Thursday, December 30, 2010

The Control Journal saved me!

The week before Christmas, my DH Randy became deathly ill. What started out as a cold-like flu morphed horribly into a very bad case of pneumonia, though I didn't know it at the time. When Randy asked to see a doctor, I knew then he was very sick. I took him to Solantic and they called an ambulance!
I had minutes to make the necessary phone calls, grab up our roomie, and drive to the hospital. I knew better than to break speed laws, much as I wanted to. While at the house picking up our roomie, I also quickly packed a few necessities for my husband's comfort. Then, I remembered one thing I'd need-- my Control Journal.
In my Control Journal was many of the things that kept me organized and --as the name implied-- in control. While our roomie drove us to the hospital, I updated the journal and made a few notes to myself as to who to call. The emergency section wasn't as filled out as I'd like, but you live and learn. That minor problem has been corrected.
As my husband was transferred from the ER of one hospital to a bed in another hospital and finally the ICU, my Control Journal and my FlyLady routines kept me from chaos both at home and while sitting at my DH's side. Now my DH is recovering, yet my house is clean and my sink is shiny.
I highly recommend the Control Journals. There's one for almost everyone and every need-- the housewife, the student, the teacher, the working woman, the financial problems, losing weight (called Body Clutter), and even one just for keeping control during the holidays.
www.flylady.net/images/OCJ.pdf is my personal control journal choice because I work at home, but if you Google "FlyLady Control Journal" you'll find a nice selection. You can also go to http://www.flylady.net/ to see and learn how to finally love yourself (FLY) and gain control over CHAOS (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome.) You'll be glad you did.

Lena Austin
http://www.lenaaustin.com/
http://depravedduchess.blogspot.com/

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

A Round of Words in 80 Days-- What Is It?

Well, it's time for the writing challenge I like: A Round of Words in 80 Days. You set your own reasonable goal, and for 80 days you do your best without obsessing or being unable to function for your home and family. The link below provides more info. I especially like the part where I just post my goal-setting and reports in my own blog. Not only will I have the factor of reporting to the ROW participants, but my blog also connects with my Facebook Notes. Therefore, I'll be accountable to all my fans. Yeah, I know how to make myself responsible, don't I? LOL!
Here's a link to their Wordpress site:
Anyone joining me?

Lena Austin
http://www.lenaaustin.com/
http://depravedduchess.blogspot.com/

Recipe: Quick n Creamy Pudding

Quick 'N' Creamy Pudding
  • Yield: 8 servings
  • Nutrition: See Below
  • Prep Time: 15 Minutes
  • Cook Time: 0 Minutes

Ingredients

  • 1 (14 oz.) can Eagle Brand® Sweetened Condensed Milk
  • 2 1/2 cups cold water
  • 2 (4-serving size) packages instant pudding mix, any flavor
  • 1 cup (1/2 pt.) heavy cream, whipped

Instructions

  • COMBINE sweetened condensed milk and water in large bowl. Add pudding mixes. Beat well. Fold in whipped cream. Spoon into individual serving dishes.
  • CHILL. Store covered in refrigerator.


Lena Austin
http://www.lenaaustin.com/
http://depravedduchess.blogspot.com/

Let's talk BDSM-- The Limits List

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Tuesday, December 14, 2010

12-- Holiday Gifts of Chocolate Cream Liqueur

Chocolate Cream Liqueurs
Collect up about 9 decorative bottles with tight lids that can hold about 1/2
cup each. This stuff is potent, so don't be tempted to give more.

2 cups light cream or half-n-half
1 14-oz can sweetened condensed milk
2 tsp instant coffee crystals
1 beaten egg yolk
1 cup Irish whiskey
1/3 cup rum
2 T chocolate-flavored syrup
1 T vanilla
In a large heavy saucepan combine light cream, sweetened condensed milk, and
coffee crystals. Cook and stir over medium heat until coffee crystals dissolve.
Gradually sti about half the hot milk mixture into the beaten egg yolk, then
return the whole thing back to the saucepan. Bring mixture to a boil. Cook and
stir over medium heat for 2 minutes. Remove saucepan from heat.
Add Irish whiskey, rum, chocolate syrup, and vanilla to the mixture. Stir well
to combine. Let mixture cool to room temperature. Transfer to bottles. Chill at
least 4 hours before serving.

To serve: Shake well. 1/4 cup per serving, so each person gets their own bottle.

Lena Austin
http://www.lenaaustin.com/
http://depravedduchess.blogspot.com/

Sunday, December 12, 2010

12 Yule: Ever-So-Easy Fruitcake

Ever So Easy Fruitcake
Makes one 10-inch cake
2-1/2 cups unsifted flour
1 tsp baking soda
2 eggs, slightly beaten
1 (27 oz) jar None Such Ready to Use Mincemeat (any variety)
1 (14 oz) can sweetened condensed milk (NOT EVAPORATED MILK!)
2 cups (I lb) mixed candied fruit
1 cup coarsely chopped nuts
Preheat oven to 300F. Grease and flour 10-inch tube or fluted tube pan. Combine
flour and baking soda. In a large bowl, combine remaining ingredents. Blend in
the flour mixture. Pour batter into prepared pan. Bake one hour plus 45-50
minutes or until wooden pick inserted near center comes out clean. Cool 15 min.
Turn out of pan and cool completely. Garnish as desired.

Note: Fruitcakes improve in texture if you wrap them in foil and allow them to
rest at least overnight. They'll be much easier to cut.

Optional fruitcake loaves: Grease two 9x5 loaf pans. Turn half the batter into
each pan. Bake one hour plus 20-25 min. Cool as above, etc.

Borden recipe collected 1992.

Lena Austin
http://www.lenaaustin.com/
http://depravedduchess.blogspot.com/

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Recipe: Easy Fudge

Reduced Fat Chocolate Fudge
3 cups (18 oz) semi-sweet chocolate chips
1 14-oz can fat-free sweetened condensed milk
dash salt
1-1/2 tsp vanilla extract

1. In a heavy saucepan over low heat, melt the chips, milk, and salt. Stir
constantly. Your patience will be rewarded.

2. Remove from heat and stir in vanilla.
3. Spread evenly into a wax paper lined square pan.
4. Chill 2 hours or until firm. Turn fudge out on a cutting board and peel the
paper off. Cut into 28 squares. Store chilled.


Website URL: http://www.LenaAustin.com/
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Catitude

Friday, December 10, 2010

Make Your Own Mocha Coffee

In this day and age, a penny saved is worth doing. This recipe came from FlyLady.net, and I give FlyLady full credit for this wonderful recipe. If you are disorganized, cluttered, and stressed trying to do it all, then FlyLady.net is for you. Everyone praises me for being so "together" and I again credit FlyLady's system. So, here's FlyLady's recipe for saving yourself that daily cost of a mocha coffee:

Making your own CafƩ Mocha does several things.


1. Saves Money


2. Saves Time


3. Saves the Environment when you use your own travel mug.


4. Warms you up on a cold day


5. Best of all; You feel loved


That is five good reasons for a cup of something warm and wonderful.


Here is my recipe.

CafƩ Mocha

You will need a:


box of good powdered milk,


a jar (8 oz) of instant coffee (decaf or regular)


Nestles Quik chocolate milk powder.






I take the jar of coffee and pour it into a mixing bowl. Then I use it as the measuring cup, because this is a proportional recipe and the jar is the guide. Then I add two jars of the chocolate milk powder (16 oz) and three jars of powdered milk (24 oz). Stir with a spoon. If you use a less expensive/coarser powdered milk, you can put all of it into a food processor or blender and mix it better. I have even used the Hazelnut instant coffee and it is great too.

To Use: Scoop out 1/4 of a cup for each mug (mix with 1 cup of hot water) you make.




I keep the Mocha Mix in a glass canister with the 1/4 cup scoop in it. It also makes a great Holiday Gift! I did purchase some really fancy chocolate milk mix once and it didn't taste as well Nestles. LOL

This is a great no cook recipe for a gift! Put in a glass jar with a pretty mug lined with plastic wrap, add directions, a measuring spoon and a bow and you have a nice little gift.

We have a great mug that keeps your cafƩ mocha hot. You know how we


forget to drink it after we make it. You don't have to travel to use a


travel mug to keep your mocha hot. It is good for those of us who get


sidetracked!


http://www.flylady.net/pages/FlyShop_purple_mug.asp

Lena here. I keep a box of dry milk powder around. It's amazing how you can stretch an expensive gallon of milk into two gallons by making up a gallon of dry, then mixing the two. You cut the fat and carbs as well! The nice part is, I can cook with the milk I make with the dry powder in emergencies.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

New Release!! Sugarplums: Make the Yuletide Gay by Lena Austin

New Release Today!!




Sugarplum: Make the Yuletide Gay
by Lena Austin
Cover art: ReneƩ George

ISBN: 978-1-60521-520-4

Genre(s): Guilty Pleasures (Contemporary), Hot Flashes

Theme(s): Christmas, Seasonal Themes, Gay and Lesbian

Series: Sugarplums

Length: Hot Flash

http://www.changelingpress.com/product.php?&upt=book&ubid=1507

Blurb:

Dr. Gary Lord was comfortable and out in his homosexuality anywhere but his southern hometown and certainly not at his parents' house. But, in Yulee, Florida, secrets are very hard to keep when the folks across town know how you season your greens the minute you say, "Pass the salt."

And there's an old high school classmate who's been waiting patiently for Gary to come home... and he plans to crash Gary's Yuletide celebration in a big way.

Excerpt:


Adam stood right behind him, trapping him with his arms, one on each side of Gary’s head. Adam looked a little like a cowboy Phantom of the Opera, with the light only illuminating one side of his face and his hat still on his head. “Only mine are gone, and they don’t need to know their son is gay. You’re still in the closet to yours, too, I guess.”

Gary admitted nothing. He didn’t care how much he wanted those firm lips on his or how much he’d fantasized about those rough, weathered hands on his body, Gary still didn’t want to believe his high school crush was within reach and offering. Somewhere, down deep in his soul, Gary dredged up one word. “Why?”

“You mean why am I doing my damndest to get you to do a horizontal tango with me? Hell, Gary.” Adam lifted his arms away from the wall and backed off. His left hand scrubbed at his forehead. Gary’d forgotten Adam was a southpaw. “I wish I knew what attracted me to you, but I’ve been running scared from you since our sophomore year, when I finally came to grips with my sexuality. You kept pushing those damn glasses up on your nose and sticking your chin in the air when you were outclassed in gym, and… aw, hell, you drove me nuts.”

“I had laser surgery on my eyes three years ago.” So maybe it wasn’t the most intelligent thing to say and in some ways was cowardly, but Gary just couldn’t accept what Adam was saying. “I don’t get it. You could have anyone. Why the nerd?”

Adam chuckled under his breath. “Finally, I get a real question. Best answer I have is that opposites attract. I’ve been waiting all year for you to come home for the holidays so you could make my Yuletide gay.”

“Very funny, Adam.” No one had popped out of the woodwork with a camera, yelling how they’d caught him in the act and were going to tell his parents and ruin their holiday, so Gary got a little bolder. “You realize I’ve no reason to trust you? Right?”

“Ye-up! I know.” Adam’s voice deepened, torturing Gary just a little more. “Guess I’m just gonna have to prove I’m serious.” His right hand touched Gary’s shoulder and gently pressed him against the wall. His left caressed the outline of Gary’s cock. “Leastways one part of you believes I ain’t lying.”

Gary had held fossils that were less hard than his dick was. So much blood had left Gary’s brain he was light-headed. Gary’s ass craved what Adam could give, and Gary let the ex-jock push him up against the chilly wainscoting for fear he’d do something stupid like beg if he opened his mouth. Hell, he’d dreamed about Adam for the past fifteen years, and now Gary was afraid to accept what Adam offered. “Fifteen years ago, I’d have been on my knees thanking Upstairs if you’d so much as blinked in my direction. I kinda idolized you.”

“I was a wuss.” Adam tossed off that statement and leaned in until Gary could feel his breath on his right cheek. “I took the easy road and let everyone believe I was the Marlboro Man, all perfect and shit. I wasn’t. Far from it.” Adam’s lips brushed his, and then Adam backed off to study Gary’s face for an objection. “Instead of all those squishy girls, all I wanted was a skinny nerd more interested in amphoras and some weird-ass device from Anti-something Greece.”

“Amphorae. The plural is amphorae. And the place is Antikythera.” Gary’s correction was automatic, considering how Adam was scrambling his brain and his pulse. “I… I can explain.”

“Later.” Adam reached around and yanked him right up to him for a little tongue duel.

Was Gary a sucker for a little domination? Okay, yes, he was. Working around Egypt, knowing his work could be yanked away at the least provocation, was stressful. Gary craved letting go and allowing someone else to take over, so he could stop thinking even for an hour. With Adam, that part was easy. Gary’s brain clicked offline as soon as Adam’s hand slid from his waist to cup Gary’s ass. Fortunately for him, Gary had a subconscious with more sense than intelligence. In response to Gary’s rising lust levels, one of his hands reluctantly slid around Adam’s waist and completed their clinch.

How long they locked lips was anyone’s guess, but eventually Adam broke off. Adam studied Gary’s glazed eyes and nodded. “’Bout time you stopped fighting me. Mind if I just bend you over the sofa? It’s the right height, I think.”

He wasn’t a shrimp, but Gary was about an inch or two shorter, so Gary gave the big leather-backed sofa a glance. “Looks pillow soft, but I won’t break if it isn’t.”

All Gary could hear was Adam’s breathing. Then Adam released him entirely. “Get naked. I want to see you. All of you.”

“Same goes, cowboy.” Gary lifted his chin and dared Adam like they were still in the schoolyard.

Adam nodded. “Fair enough.”

http://www.changelingpress.com/product.php?&upt=book&ubid=1507

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Impossibly Easy Octoberfest Pie

Impossibly Easy Octoberfest Pie
1/2 lb fully cooked bratwurst (about 3), cut into 3/4-inch pieces
1 1/3 cups drained sauerkraut (from 14-oz can)
1 cup shredded Swiss cheese (4 oz)
3/4 cup Original Bisquick® mix
1/2 cup milk
1/2 cup regular or nonalcoholic beer
2 eggs

  1. Heat oven to 400°F. Spray 9-inch glass pie plate with cooking spray. Sprinkle bratwurst, sauerkraut and cheese in pie plate.
  2. In small bowl, stir remaining ingredients until blended. Pour into pie plate.
  3. Bake 30 to 35 minutes or until knife inserted in center comes out clean. Let stand 5 minutes before serving.
Make the Most of This Recipe
Success
Pie plates vary in size from manufacturer to manufacturer. Using too small a pie plate will cause the pie to run over while baking. Pie plate sizes are usually marked on the backs of the plates; if not marked, measure from inside rim to inside rim.
Serve With
Make a quick salad of sliced beets and red onion rings on a bed of greens drizzled with vinaigrette dressing. Serve rye rolls or bread on the side.

Nutrition Information:

Nutrition Information:
1 Serving (1 Serving)
  • Calories 300
    • (Calories from Fat 180),
  • Total Fat 20g
    • (Saturated Fat 9g,
    • Trans Fat 1g),
  • Cholesterol 110mg;
  • Sodium 980mg;
  • Total Carbohydrate 15g
    • (Dietary Fiber 2g,
    • Sugars 4g),
  • Protein 14g;
Percent Daily Value*:
  • Calcium ;
Exchanges:
  • 1 Starch;
  • 0 Fruit;
  • 0 Other Carbohydrate;
  • 0 Skim Milk;
  • 0 Low-Fat Milk;
  • 0 Milk;
  • 0 Vegetable;
  • 0 Very Lean Meat;
  • 0 Lean Meat;
  • 1 1/2 High-Fat Meat;
  • 1 1/2 Fat;
Carbohydrate Choices:
  • 1;
*Percent Daily Values are based on a 2,000 calorie diet.

Lena Austin
http://www.lenaaustin.com/
http://depravedduchess.blogspot.com/

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

A Writing Challenge for the Rest of Us-- A Round of Words in 80 Days

WOW!! THIS is the kind of writing challenge I can do! I'm so excited, I'm beside myself. Finally, a writing challenge that doesn't ask me to give up my life for a specified period of time. Really, NaNoWriMo is, for me, a setup for failure. I can't write that much, nor do I want to. Not to mention that November is a special month here in my home with two birthdays, one holiday, and I'm organized enough to be wrapping up my holiday shopping.
So, I'm in. I'll be linking my blog and starting on Round One in January through March. (Yes, that reasonable a time frame.)
Here's a copy of what she proposes:
Here's what I propose:
  • A challenge that happens 4 times a year with a break between sessions.
  • Round 1 starts January 3, 2011 (because I like starting things on Monday and this way everyone can recover from New Year's excesses) and runs through March 24th.  (Round 2 would start April 4, Round 3 July 4–okay maybe rethink that–, Round 4 Oct 3–you get the idea).
  • You have 80 days for your Round of Words
  • Your goal can be anything you like as long as it is MEASURABLE. If you're already in the middle of a WIP, that's fine.  Tailor your goal to suit that.  You may even want to set mini goals (I want to finish the last 40k of this novel.  Then I want to spend the last 20 days revising it at x pages a day.).  There are a lot of elements to writing a book other than the writing itself.  Plotting.  Outlining.  Character Interviews.  Whatever.  Set your goal to match wherever you are right now on your WIP.  If you want to use your Round for editing a novel, that's fine too.  Just know that this is, at heart, a writing challenge, so all the weekly inspirational posts will be geared in that direction.
  • There's no mandatory daily word count. Every writer is different, everyone has different schedules.  You set a goal that works for you.  Find a way to make writing a priority in your life in a way that FITS.  But set SOME kind of schedule and be CONSISTENT.
  • Once Sign-Ups are open, you'll make a blog post stating your measurable goal and swing by here to link to it in the Linky Tools list. If your goal changes because you've met it before the 80 days is up, just write a new one and link to it on a check in day.
  • There will be twice a week check-ins on Sunday and Wednesday where you'll update us via the same method. The idea here is that folks can travel around to everybody's blogs and drop a supportive comment.  We're contemplating dividing into teams under each of the sponsors so that everyone has a manageable list of folks to visit once a week.
  • On Twitter we'll use a hashtag of #ROW80 so everyone can follow discussions (though if you're not on Twitter, that's totally fine too).
I don't know about Linky, but I'm trying it.

Lena Austin
http://www.lenaaustin.com/
http://depravedduchess.blogspot.com/

It's Friday in Moorooka! Win Free Books For A Year!

 
Moorooka, Queensland, Australia
Current Time Friday, December 10, 2010 at 12:00 Midnight
Current conditions in Moorooka
Passing clouds. Mild. 75 °F
Duration of day: 13 hours, 50 minutes (29 seconds longer than yesterday)

New Releases
    MINE! by Marteeka Karland and Shara Azod $3.49
Larissa has finally met the man of her dreams. Literally.
    The Vampire's Pet by Delilah Hunt $4.49
A vampire discovers his pet wolf is a shapeshifting female of an enemy race.
    SPOTLIGHT: Stocking Stuffer: Werewolf Christmas by Kyla Logan $2.49
Who does that delicious scent belong to and how can Theron claim the owner for
his mate?
    Sugarplum: Just Wink by Bryl R. Tyne $2.99
"What haven't I made clear? Desire. Ecstasy. Satisfaction. In that order!"
    Sugarplum: Christmas in the Zone by Isabella Jordan $2.99
Two guys, two gals, and an aphrodisiac under the tree...
    Sugarplum: Kitchen Witch by Dawn Montgomery $2.99
Sex, magic, and cookies... what a treat!
    Sugarplum: Make the Yuletide Gay by Lena Austin $2.99
Beware the cowboy bearing gifts, who may make Dr. Gary Lord's Yuletide much
gayer than he'd planned.
    Sugarplum: Mistletoe by Amber Kallyn $2.99
What's a great way to spend a night with your mate? Indulge and make his body
your very own buffet.
Changeling's most popular contest ever is back --
Join us for Changeling's 7th Annual Christmas Party!
This year, Changeling is giving away Free Books For A Year -- Times Four!
* Twelve First Round winners -- three winners every week in December 'til
Christmas -- will receive one free Changeling book of their choice.
* Six Finalists will receive two free Changeling books of their choice every
week for the month of January.
Four Changeling winners will receive Free Books For A Year!
*Two First Prize winners will receive two free Changeling books of their choice
every month for a year.
*Two Grand Prize winners will receive two free Changeling books of their choice
every week for a year!
The best part -- there are no codes and no entry forms -- every $2.99 Sugarplum
E-book purchased counts as a chance to win.
And now the fine print -- only we made it bigger.
* First Round Winners and Finalists are eligible to win more than one prize.
* Winners will be chosen from purchasers of books in the Changeling Press
Sugarplum Series; each Sugarplum e-book purchase made in the month of December
2010 before the final prizes are announced counts as an entry.
* Prizes are available as Changeling Press E-books, to be downloaded from
ChangelingPress.com only.
* Free book download links do not accumulate, and will expire if not used.
* Winners will be announced December 31st at the Changeling New Year's Eve
Party, held on our Changeling Press Readers' Loop.

Margaret Riley
Publisher, http://www.changelingpress.com/

Monday, December 6, 2010

Recipe: Friendship Tea to Give as a Gift

When I was a kid, this was the gift to get from my mother.
Friendship Tea
18 oz Tang orange drink mix
1 cup instant iced tea
2 cups granulated sugar or Splenda
1 package lemonade Kool-aid mix
1-1/2 tsp ground cinnamon
3/4 tsp ground cloves
Mix and place in a well-sealed jar or other decorative container. For hot tea, mix 2/3 T of mix and 1 cup hot water.


Lena Austin
http://www.lenaaustin.com/
http://depravedduchess.blogspot.com/

Sunday, December 5, 2010

RECIPE: Tres Leches Cake from Lena Austin


I'm lazy! Using a cake mix to save time suits me. This turns out delish! Because it's white, it lends itself to a holiday celebration.

Lena

Tres Leches Cake

Makes 12 to 15 servings

One package (about 18 oz.) white cake mix, plus ingredients to prepare mix
one can (14 ounces) sweetened condensed milk
one cup milk
one cup (1/2 pint) whipping cream
one container (8 oz.) whipped topping, thawed
fresh fruit

1.  Preheat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit. Spray a 13 by 9 by 2 inch baking pan with nonstick cooking spray.
2.  Prepare cake mix according to package directions.  Bake about 35 to 40 minutes or until cake is firm to the touch.  Remove cake from oven; cool five minutes.
3.  Meanwhile, combine sweetened condensed milk, milk and whipping cream in a four cup measure.  Poke holes all around the warm cake, using a wooden skewer or toothpick.  Slowly pour milk mixture evenly over top of holes on cake.  Let cake cool 10 to 15 minutes more to absorb all liquid.  Cover and refrigerate cake in pan at least one hour.
4.  When cake is completely cool, spread whipped topping evenly on top.  Cut into pieces and serve with fresh fruit.  Keep cake covered and refrigerated.
.

__,_._,___

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Recipe: Snowballs

I've been making these since I was seventeen. That's over 30 years.
Snowballs
1/2 c. confectioner's 10x sugar
1/4 tsp salt
1 cup butter, softened
1 tsp vanilla
2-1/4 c all purpose flour
1/2 c chopped pecans
More 10x sugar (an extra bag is wise)
Makes 5 dozen, so set up a lot of cookie sheets while the dough chills. You may use silicon mats, if desired.
Mix the first three ingredients together well. Stir in the vanilla. Now gradually add the flour. Be patient. When all the flour is gone, now work in the nuts. Cover the bowl with foil and chill it well, at least an hour or two.
Pour the extra confectioner's sugar into a shallow bowl or pie plate. If you have helpers, give them each their own pie plate and storage container. From here on, everything moves pretty quickly, so being set up in advance makes the process go more smoothly.
Turn your oven on to 400F now and allow it to warm up. Use a melon baller, teaspoon measure, or a small child's hands to form the dough into 1-inch balls. Don't be tempted to make them larger. Place them on ungreased cookie sheets. Bake at 400F for 8-10 minutes until set but not brown. As soon as you can pick them up, roll them in the powdered sugar and put them on a rack to cool. Roll them again in the sugar, then put in storage containers.  You may use any leftover sugar to pack around the cookies for storage, if they make it to the pantry at all.

Lena Austin
http://www.lenaaustin.com/
http://depravedduchess.blogspot.com/

Friday, December 3, 2010

Humor: What is a Calorie??





 

 What is a calorie?
 
Calories are the little bastards that get into your wardrobe at 
 night and sew your clothes tighter.   
MY CLOSET IS INFESTED WITH THE LITTLE SHITS!

  
__________________________________________________________
  





 



Thursday, December 2, 2010

Decisions, Decisions...Will you help?

Please email me at: voiceomt2002@gmail.com
I need help deciding what to take with me to a Christmas party. Here are my choices:
1. Creamy Coffee Eggnog made with coffee, eggnog, whipped topping, and cinnamon (Really high carb, and easily served cold)
2. Crock Pot Chai-- a hot chai tea mix kept warm in the crock pot (Easy, hot, but difficult to transport)
3. Freezer Canapes-- meat spreads served on small bread squares. (Convenient, but I can't eat any because of the bread.)

Lena Austin
http://www.lenaaustin.com/
http://depravedduchess.blogspot.com/

I was quoted on FlyLady!! Wow!!

Pam here: I just found a comment by a novelist who discovered my Stick it Right on the Money Gift kit and wrote about it. I think her sentiments match Jenny's.

This has to be the most innovative way to give a plain old monetary gift some pizzazz to show you really did think about what gift would suit the recipient.
My mother in law used to say that giving money, gift certificates, and gift cards were in a way a cop out and borderline rude. They require very little thought, and while "one size does fit all" it does show a certain casual disregard for the likes and dislikes of the recipient or even little more than a nod to the occasion. However in today's busy world, sometimes giving cash can mean a whole lot more, especially when friends and family can be many miles apart. Cash spends well without having to worry. Now, with Stick It Right On the Money stickers, you can do more than give a nod to the occasion! Each frame and stickers are "Post-it" sticky, so the money isn't damaged. (That's illegal.) See the video at the website. What a great gift idea.
Lena Austin
www.stickitrightonthemoney.com


Note from Lena: I've been a FlyBaby for years, but this is huge. Marla Cilley, aka The FlyLady, has millions of followers and devoted fans. I'm one of them. This is like having Nora Roberts quote me. I'm ready to faint. http://www.flylady.net/ I'm on FlyLady's BigTent site, where her fans can get updates and household hints every day. That's where this quote came from.

Lena Austin
http://www.lenaaustin.com/
http://depravedduchess.blogspot.com/

Humor of the Day: Do Not Disturb Sign

Yes, I'm easily amused, but this...


I'd love to see some comments on this.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Recipe: Christmas Blondies

Christmas Blondies

Christmas Blondies

Ingredients

  • 2/3  cup  butter, softened
  • 2  cups  packed brown sugar
  • 2  large  eggs
  • 1  Tbsp.  cherry brandy or cherry juice (optional)
  • 1-1/2  tsp.  baking powder
  • 2  tsp.  vanilla
  • 1/4  tsp.  salt
  • 2-1/4  cups  all-purpose flour
  • 1  cup  chopped walnuts, toasted*
  • 3/4  cup  chopped white or dark sweet chocolate
  • 1/2  cup  coarsely chopped candied cherries

Directions

1. Heat oven to 350 degrees F. Lightly grease a 13x9-inch baking pan.
2. In large mixing bowl beat butter on medium speed 30 seconds. Add brown sugar; beat until well-combined. Beat in eggs, brandy, baking powder, vanilla, and salt. Add flour; beat just until blended. Stir in nuts, chocolate, and cherries. Spread in prepared pan.
3. Bake 30 minutes or until golden. Cool completely in pan on wire rack. Cut in bars. Makes 24 bars.
4. *Spread nuts in shallow baking pan. Toast in 350 degree F oven for 5 minutes.

Nutrition Facts

  • Calories240,
  • Total Fat (g)10,
  • Saturated Fat (g)5,
  • Monounsaturated Fat (g)2,
  • Polyunsaturated Fat (g)3,
  • Cholesterol (mg)32,
  • Sodium (mg)125,
  • Carbohydrate (g)34,
  • Total Sugar (g)24,
  • Fiber (g)1,
  • Protein (g)3,
  • Calcium (DV%)5,
  • Iron (DV%)5,
  • Percent Daily Values are based on a 2,000 calorie diet

Lena Austin
http://www.lenaaustin.com/
http://depravedduchess.blogspot.com/

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Recipe: Cherry Almond Balls

 
http://www.LenaAust in.comhttp://depravedduch ess.blogspot. comhttp://third- infinity. blogspot. comhttp://fatfrogdiary .blogspot. com
I made these the other day. OMG, they are candy...don' t treat them like anything else. Oh, and keep the dough chilled. Do not neglect the sprinkles. You need a coating.
  
KaroCherryAlmondBalls.jpg Cherry Almond Balls picture by voiceomt2002

 
Writing blog:
Craft and Pagan blog:
Low Carb Diet blog:

KittenWatchesSoldier-1.jpg Watch over the Fireman Kitten image by voiceomt2002

Lena Austin
.

Adult Excerpt: Dire Wolves: White Heat by Shelby Morgen (Paranormal, AA, Werewolves)


Posted: 27 Nov 2010 04:36 AM PST
Dire Wolves: White Heat


by Shelby Morgen

Cover art: Bryan Keller

ISBN: 978-1-60521-479-5

Genre(s): Paranormal, Action/Adventure

Theme(s): Werewolves

Series: Dire Wolves (Multi-Author)

Length: Novella

http://www.changelingpress.com/product.php?&upt=book&ubid=1474

Blurb:
Time to take down the fanatical Human Defense League. The Ulfhednar Council's got just the men for the job. But the last thing Jake Parker wants is a partner. Especially not another Alpha wolf -- and definitely not the man who stole his woman.


Heather Grant's got far too much experience working with stubborn males. She figures it would serve both Alphas right if their pride blows their cover. But someone's got to salvage the mission. What she doesn't count on is her instant reaction to Jake Parker's wolf. Just the scent of this particular Alpha's got her hormones racing.

How's a man supposed to concentrate with an utterly sexy Dire Wolf bitch flashing her tail at him? If he gets out of this mission alive, Jake swears he's going to kill the woman. Or claim her.

Excerpt:
Dire Wolves: White Heat


Shelby Morgen

All rights reserved.

Copyright ©2010 Shelby Morgen



This e-book file contains sexually explicit scenes and adult language which some may find offensive and which is not appropriate for a young audience. Changeling Press E-Books are for sale to adults, only, as defined by the laws of the country in which you made your purchase. Please store your files wisely, where they cannot be accessed by under-aged readers.



"Jackpot."

"No shit." At least two dozen more M16s, equipped with four rail hand guards, scopes, and collapsible stocks, as well as a couple M50 machine guns, and stack after stack of tactical readiness packs full of thirty round mags. Fuck. There was enough ammo in this room alone to take out Denver.



Not to mention the case cleaner, loading press, and crimper. The air reeked of silver. If he'd ever had any doubt --



"What the hell are you two doing?"



Jake resisted the urge to spin on his heel and land an elbow in the chest of the person who'd managed to sneak up behind him -- but only because the whispered voice belonged to a woman. No matter how deep undercover he was, he didn't hit women.



He might shoot her, but there was no way he was going to hit her.



A glance over his shoulder almost made him regret that decision. Heather Grant. Of all the gin joints... "What the hell are you doing here?"



"My job. Which is to get your sorry asses out of whatever cluster-fuck you two have gotten yourselves into."



John Wolfe treated Heather to a throaty growl of disapproval. "We're doing fine, thanks. Who's this?" He addressed the question to Jake, though he didn't take his attention off the woman.



Jake sighed. "My wife."



"Your what?"



Jake took a small bit of satisfaction in the bigger man's obvious surprise. "I told you I wasn't after Doc Grier." Which was the truth. Mostly.



The Council had decided Wolfe needed backup on this mission. They neglected to ask. Though that was nothing new. The Council never really asked anyone. They just issued orders. So here Jake was, trying to run an undercover op, sandwiched between the big, rangy wolf who thought Jake was after his woman, and Heather, the hard-headed handler who'd played the role of his wife for the last five years. Really. Could life get any better?



John frowned at them speculatively. "Zan said you were married, but..."



"Would you two shut the fuck up before you get us all killed? Between the two of you you're about as subtle as a herd of moose."



Red hair and a temper to match. Not to mention a killer bod that looked even better in tight fitting jeans and that scrap of camo. Jake grinned, enjoying her fit of pique. Maybe he'd tell Wolfe they weren't really married, and then again, maybe he wouldn't. This could be fun. Wolfe had it coming, too, after the way he'd been acting so proprietary around Doc Grier. Two Alpha wolves. One woman. A recipe for disaster.



The heavy tread of boots in the corridor brought an immediate halt to the get-to-know-you bullshit.



Before Jake had time to react, Heather dove at Jake, landing with her legs wrapped around his waist and her lips plastered over his in what had to be the least romantic kiss of his life. Though, perversely, his cock sprung to immediate attention. Had to be a proximity thing, because there was nothing even vaguely sexy about getting shot.



"Hey! You there! What the hell are you two doing in here?" Wolfe's voice sang out loud enough to wake the dead.



The sudden appearance of multiple M16s had an immediate calming effect on Jake's libido. He peeled Heather off his waist and set her on the floor, pushing her protectively behind him. "Dude, if you have to ask..."



"I can see what you're doing, idiot. Why are you doing it here? In this room? In this building? This area's supposed to be secure!"



Wolfe was way too into his role, Jake thought with a barely disguised grin. But it was working. The guards immediately moved to back up their new head of security.



There were three of them, all armed to the teeth. With a bit of a distraction, Jake might be able to take down two of them, but three? Not unless he went wolf...



"For fuck's sake, Val, it's a closet. Where the hell else are we supposed to make out?" Val. Trust Heather to get their cover names right. He'd find out what the hell hers was and what she was doing here later. Damn the Council and their interfering ways, anyway. Though right now, she was damn handy.



Wolfe wasn't the only one who could play his part. Jake turned on Heather, pouring his frustration into his act. "Look, woman, if you don't clean up that raunchy mouth of yours, we're not going to be making out anywhere. You got a mouth like a toilet on you, you know that?"



"You didn't say that when it was wrapped around that little prick of yours, did you?"



"You didn't say it was little then, either. More like Oh, Burt, you're so big... Oh, Burt, give it to me harder! I should have listened to my mother." (Who'd told him, Go to medical school. The pack needs more doctors.)



It wasn't easy to defy your mother, especially when she was a Dire Wolf. And a member of the Ulfhednar Ruling Council. If he got shot out here, she'd never forgive him.



"All right! All right! That's enough," Wolfe barked. "We got a mission to prepare for. You two deserve each other. Get the hell out of here."



Jake reached for Heather and she ducked away, sliding between the men and heading for the doorway. "Besides, you said you like it when I talk dirty."

http://www.changelingpress.com/product.php?&upt=book&ubid=1474

Monday, November 29, 2010

ADULT Excerpt: Eyes of the Cowan by Lena Austin

 
Eyes of the Cowan by Lena  Austin
Read an excerpt
 
 http://www.changelingpress.com/product.php?&upt=book&ubid=662

Eyes of the Cowan

by Lena Austin

Cover art: ReneƩ George

ISBN: 978-1-59596-770-1
Genre(s): Paranormal
Theme(s): Magic and Mayhem, BBW
Length: Novella
 Excerpt: Eyes of the Cowan

Lena Austin
All rights reserved.
Copyright ©2007 Lena Austin
An Authorized Excerpt

This e-book file contains sexually explicit scenes and adult language which some may find offensive and which is not appropriate for a young audience. Changeling Press E-Books are for sale to adults, only, as defined by the laws of the country in which you made your purchase. Please store your files wisely, where they cannot be accessed by under-aged readers.

 

Valda bent her head and nodded. She wasn't going to describe those first couple of years, living off a receptionist's salary and submitting articles she typed up at night in a tiny rented trailer just outside Boulder, Colorado. "Took me two years to make it to -- what did you call it? -- token coward."

"Cowan. Cow Ann." He poured the contents of the pot into something else, staring intently at his work for a moment. "They certainly needed the eyes of a cowan on things. We forget non-believers don't see things like we do."

See things? Like men who glowed golden even inside houses, like Blaze did now? Even the stupid log in front of her glowed slightly. Her hands shook and the little rose in her hand ended up glued sideways on the log. Valda shuddered and changed the subject. "Hey, aren't I supposed to be interviewing you, Mr. Famous Author?"

"Anytime you're ready." He laughed and shoved something that sounded like plastic to the side. "These will take a while to harden."

Spike had reappeared, in that silent way cats had, and was now yowling and begging. She snorted as he stretched himself to his fullest length to reach the top of the counter, pawing at something.

Blaze shooed him away. "No, I am not giving you LSD for cats. Go chase a mouse or eat your cat food."

"LSD for cats?" she repeated. "Chocolate? What are you making, anyway?" It smelled like a confectionary in the kitchen with the bread and chocolate smells.

"Come see, if you like."

Curiosity got the best of her. It always did. That was what made her a journalist instead of some comfortable wage slave in a cubicle. She sighed and got up to wander behind the island.

Penises. Chocolate penises, all lined up in neat little molds on the counter. Some were life-sized and some were no bigger than her thumb. The larger versions were three dimensional, and the smaller were flat on one side.

The surprise made her lifelong curse activate. She tripped on the rug in front of the sink and went sprawling. Naturally, because Murphy hated her, she fell sideways and slapped her hand into a mold of the largest penis collection as she attempted to catch herself.

On her way to the floor, everything slowed, like some sort of hokey scene out of a movie. She saw the first splash of chocolate catch a flabbergasted Blaze right in the face and chest.

Her impact at his feet might have been funny to anyone else, and probably twice as hilarious when the rest of the mold teetered off the counter to dump the remainder on her until it rattled on the tiles beside her. Upside down, of course. Her glasses skittered across the floor and disappeared from view.

Silence was not golden, not when you wallowed in humiliation with your eyes shut. She broke it with the only thing left to her -- humor. She didn't bother opening her eyes. "Did I mention my middle name is Grace?" It wasn't really, but he didn't need to know that. She waited, praying for laughter.

Her prayer was answered. His chuckle started low, and began to crescendo like music. She cracked an eye.

Blaze, his handsome face a startling mask of chocolate, like the Phantom of the Opera in a negative print, was guffawing so hard he had to hold his side. "And how was charm school, Grace?"

Perversely, Valda got annoyed. "It's not that funny!"

The big buffoon collapsed down on the floor beside her. In between chuckles and wiping his eyes, he managed to say, "You're priceless, pretty owl." He suppressed his laughter and wiped a tear from his un-chocolate-covered eye. "Valda Anastasia Lyman, no one has ever reacted quite that way to my cooking."

Shock made her roll over and sit up in the confined space between the cabinets. "How did you know my full name?"

He gave her That Look again. That superior, slightly smug, I'm-a-witch look. They were almost nose-to-nose. The wish to slap the smugness and humor off his face warred with the need to do something shocking. Shocking won.

She would never know the reason why she did it. Impulse took over, and she licked the chocolate off his neck. The rich flavor slid over her tongue. "Your cooking is excellent, by the way."

She sat back, her face dripping with warm chocolate, intending to get a laugh then quietly exit to die of mortification in her room. Maybe hara-kiri was in order.

Those dark sapphire eyes of his matched his name. Strong hands clamped over her arms and yanked her until their noses touched. Then his head tilted to the side and he nibbled the chocolate off the side of her chin. "It tastes much better this way," he murmured.

The heated ball of lust she'd managed to control up to now flared. Valda couldn't stop the moan that pushed its way past her lips.

Blaze was nibbling his way down to her neck. "No objections?" He waited a moment. "Good." He pulled her into his lap without removing his lips from her neck. "I've wanted to do this since I laid eyes on you." He looked down at the cat, busily licking some of the spill off the floor. "Beat it, Spike."

Object? She could barely think. This gorgeous, talented man wanted her? Aw, to hell with it. Why not? It wasn't going to affect whatever she chose to write about him. Besides, what he was doing to her skin was driving her insane. A nice, slow carriage ride to madness sounded like the perfect way to go.

"Yeah? The feeling is mutual." She leaned back on his left arm and bared all her throat.

He was licking his way down to the hollow of at the base of her neck. "Last chance, Valda. I don't coerce." His free hand was working her shirt from her waistband by inches.

"Your safe sex or mine?" God, her voice was wanton, husky and had a distinctly feline purr in it.

"Mine." The hand that had been working on her shirt dug in a drawer above their heads and brandished a foil packet. "I had hopes, so I put this where I could get it easily."

She let him pull her shirt off her while she pondered the implications of the packet. "I'm not... I don't... oh, God." He'd unsnapped her bra without her being aware of it, pushed it aside, and buried his face underneath one of the heavy orbs.

"I know you don't." He licked the underside of her breast and shifted her off his lap to put her on the rug. "But that fancy nightgown of yours last night has been killing me by inches. A man can dream, can't he?" He switched to the other breast without touching her aching and rock hard nipples.

Her hands moved of their own volition to get under his tee shirt. The body under it was the stuff her dreams were made of. Fair was fair. "I didn't know you saw me. Shit, Blaze, if you don't do something about my tits, I'm going to rip this shirt off you."

He lifted his head and looked fully into her eyes. Mischief lit his face. In a bad Romanian accent, he quoted an old comedy. "'For you, never a quickie. Always a longie.'" But he took off the shirt.

"Right here?"

"Right here, right now." He bent and brushed his lips over hers. "I've waited long enough for you."

That slow southern drawl of his would have fired up any woman's lust. His right hand cupped one of her breasts and lifted the weight of it without attempting to dial Radio Free Europe. Most men, upon seeing a pair of tits that matched the rest of her abundant flesh, seemed to think nothing of causing pain in their excitement, forgetting they were still attached to a living woman. His head bent to lap at the areola and crinkling nipple between his thumb and forefinger.

It should have been funny. The man's face was half-covered in chocolate. Instead, she found it erotic. "I'll never look at chocolate again without thinking of this." She chuckled and added, "When I'm old and gray, I'll ask, who was that masked man?"

Blaze looked up at her in puzzlement for a moment before releasing her breast. He fingered his face. "Oh. Yeah." Then he reached up on the counter and pulled down a bowl. "I think I have another use for my Beltane chocolate recipe."

http://www.changelingpress.com/product.php?&upt=book&ubid=662 

 
Website URL: http://www.lenaaustin.com/ 

Welcome to my Blog!

Thanks for popping by! Don't sit on the whipping horse unless you want to find out how it's used. I speak my mind and annoy many people, but all of it is meant in good spirit. Feel free to argue with me. I like it.

Best way to reach me is by email: voiceomt2002@yahoo.com

Lena